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4 Tips to Boost Your Self-Confidence

You cannot escape the responsibility of tomorrow by evading it today.
– Abraham Lincoln

Life is the most beautiful gift to all of us from the supernatural spirit. It’s a journey that never ends until our last breath. There is abundance of knowledge to explore, people to meet and places to see in relatively short time that we live on this earth.

We shackle our minds with worries of the failures of the past and unborn tomorrows.

You can learn  to roll the iron doors of self-confidence on the failures of the past. You can climb the mountain of worries by taking control of your life, and taking control of your self-confidence.

Why worry about things I can’t change ?

Acceptance of what has happened is the first step to overcome worries caused by the failures of the past. Why worry about circumstances,  if you can’t influence the outcome?

The Sanders Court & Café — owned by famous Colonel Sanders — catered mainly to travelers on their way to Florida through the town of Corbin, Kentucky. In early 1950’s, a new interstate was in the works that would cause a significant loss in business, forcing Sanders to retire and sell his restaurant.

Instead of depending on the government for the Social Security check, colonel Sanders used this adversity, which was beyond his control,  to start a new franchise “Kentucky Fried Chicken”  in 1952 at age of 62. The rest is history.

You may have fallen in to abyss of emotional trauma for things that recently happened in your life. Worrying about things that you can not change — nor find any solutions for– can cost you many opportunities of tomorrow.

I will embrace reality. Whatever happened has happened for the better tomorrow.

 Why worry about things that have not seen daylight yet ?

Researchers have found that 99 percent of our worries are related to things that never happen in our lives. I have always worried about losing everything that I have. What will I do ? How am I going to survive and pay all the bills ?

Needless to say, these worries only existed in my mind.

I will not clutter my mind with thoughts of things that may never happen.

After all, it’s not about me.

Let’s face it. We all worry about the past that haunt us for the fact that we correlate the failed result of a planned action with our self-esteem. We forget that — regardless of the extent of prudent thinking and planning, as a human being — we are prone to err.

As I explore deeper into the reasoning for this correlation, it becomes visibly clear to me that I felt defeated when my efforts failed. Babe Ruth is known for his home runs, but he also holds strike out record.

If I can detach my ego out of my thought process, I can boost my self-confidence to live life with as much passion as a mother loves her child with all his or her err.

I will think positively and act now ; let the future take its course.

Develop laser sharp focus on the task at hand.

Do you remember the feeling when the last time you immersed yourself with all of your thoughts and focus on a single task ?

By developing laser sharp focus on the smallest task at hand and completing that task, you will immensely boost your self-confidence. You’ll develop mindfulness to pour all your efforts to task at hand without allowing your mind to wander around the web of worries.

Today is life-the only life you are sure of. Make the most of today. Get interested in something. Shake yourself awake. Develop a hobby. Let the winds of enthusiasm sweep through you. Live today with gusto. -Dale Carnegie

(Photo Courtesy: tree07)

Comments (33)

Confidence is SO important – I always say fake it until you make it. Sometimes, lack of confidence comes from things like not knowing about a topic or not being confident in your expertise.

Agreed. Self-Confidence comes from relentless efforts to be good at what your are doing. It takes deep reading and/or working with those who are master at the subject that you are pursuing.

It often amazes me how people worry about things completely out of their control. Our emotions really get in the way of thinking clearly and fear does often control our lives.

It’s sad, but I meet with people on a daily basis that are only focused on “what if.” I’ve done my best to focus on managing what I can control and having peace knowing that in the end, what will be, will be.

Well said Jason. We can win over most of our worries and boost our self-confidence if we focus only on things that we can control.

As a marketing research professional, my wife has ‘re-positioned’ what we might refer to as worrying. She now calls it “strategic thinking.” 🙂

That’s a creative way to think about our worries Kurt. 🙂

Sometimes my mind is my own prison. Fears of failure, doubts and lack of self-confidence conspire to bring me down. I think it’s all about mind, since our minds are the prisms through which we view and interact with the world. Really great close; it’s important to develop that laser-like focus and take care of the tasks at hand.

I love this quote Kevin — “I think it’s all about mind, since our minds are the prisms through which we view and interact with the world.” It’s a wonderful way to put why and how we think and act in perspective. Indeed, life is a culmination of thoughts that we harbor and action that we take(or lack of).

Shilpan, nice list. Liked “laser sharp focus” part.
Here is what helps me when I lose my confidence “screw it, let’s do it!” 😉

Alik, that’s a nice way to start all over when we fail in our efforts. I always enjoy your wisdom my friend.

Nice post, Shilpan! Worrying about things that we can’t change is a biggie. It makes no sense to spend valuable time worrying about such matters. It;s best to just avoid thinking about them, and focus on those things that we can change and control.

I’ve learned to overcome most of my worries by knowing if I can or can’t control them.

I think these tips for confidence are also correlated directly with feelings of negativity. If you’re feeling down and being negative about every single thing, chances are you won’t notice the positive consequences that could come out of a bad situation!

Negativity always fosters more negativity. 🙂

Yeah man, babe ruth also has a strikeout record…that’s a little known fact that’s pretty important! When I think about the future and all that could go wrong too much, I remind myself what my mom always told me (I know, lame, but she’s a smart lady!), “Cross that bridge when you get to it.” And usually, when it comes to disaster scenarios, you never get to that bridge. And if you actually do, it’s never as scary and crazy as you imagined.

Well said. I like your mom’s wisdom.

I am hands down the worrying type. I don’t necessarily feel like I am being negative, I just tend to worry a lot. My dad always tells me to chill out and stop worrying about things out of my control, but its so hard to do.

Even though I worry, I still think I’m a pretty confident person.

It’s quite remarkable that you are confident person. That’s all matters at the end of the day. 🙂

My ego definitively keeps me from having the confidence to succeed. I hate to fail! But I’ve realized that like investing, that’s part of the risk one must take if they look to advance their potential reward.

Those who fail in their endeavors are far more successful than those who never take a chance. 🙂

Great points Shilpan. I especially like the laser focus point, and the quote by Dale Carnegie was perfect. Too often we don’t rigorously interrogate where we want to be!

It’s hard to focus when your mind is wandering around the web of worries. Yet, it’s absolutely essential to develop laser sharp focus to move forward.

I’m a natural worrier, but that doesn’t stop me from barreling ahead and making huge mistakes. Your post reminds me of the David Allen (of GTD fame) and his advice to try to be “like water” and flow with the situation. You can’t flow if your head isn’t squarely in the “now.”

Now you’ve inspired me to read David Allen’s book. 🙂

You are so right, Shilpan. Whenever I find myself truly floundering.. I am worry about things that are not even here, or things out of my control..

I have to remind myself to breathe, focus, and pay attention to what really matters

You are right Jefferson. Most of our worries exist only in our minds.

needless worry haunted my mother her entire life draining the joy.

Infected at an early age I’ve struggled against it many years.

Most importantly I’ve tried to inoculate my daughter from it:
http://jlcollinsnh.wordpress.com/2011/06/19/on-fathers-day-why-im-not-worried-and-you-shouldnt-be-either/

Plan and dream your future, but spend not a single moment worrying about it. Few things are a greater waste than worry.

Focus on the Now. Live each day for itself. Most of all, enjoy the journey.

Focusing on now if the key to overcome worries.

[…] 4 Tips to Boost Your Self-Confidence You cannot escape the responsibility of tomorrow by evading it today. – Abraham Lincoln Life is the most beautiful gift to all of us from the supernatural spirit. It’s a journey that never ends until our last breath. There is abundance of knowledge to explore,… Read more […]

Very good written story. It will be beneficial to anybody who utilizes it, as well as myself. Keep doing what you are doing – for sure i will check out more posts.

[…] believe that building your self-confidence is infinitely more important than building an emergency fund. Think about it. Most immigrants […]

We also need to accept who we are and do not pretend. In achieving goals, confidence in ourselves is needed. Believe yourself that we can do it because the impossible will become possible if we believe.